The Nerd Affair

I wish I wasn’t myself sometimes. The feeling of having no emotions just seems like a better way to live. If only I could let things go easily, the slightest of things, I wouldn’t feel this way all the time. 

I hate it. Not to have enough control over the amount of emotions I put into something. It’s always either absolutely ignoring something or pouring my whole heart out. This isn’t even real but it feels so real to me. I cried. It’s been 2 days (or even 3, I’ve lost count) of having a heavy heart for something that isn’t even my life.

I feel so much for this and I think I should quit but something tells me to press on. 

Being left out is something that I constantly feel, whether it’s true or it isn’t. I need to stop feeling this way before I jump off a building and the world doesn’t even care.

My emotions are uncalled for and I can’t tell anyone about it before it seems too absurd. Everyone will scoff at me for being this insane to something that isn’t real at all. 

I just wish it would stop hurting so much. 

Bucketlist

1) See Band of Horses live
2) See Iron and Wine live
3) See Laura Marling live
4) See Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes live
5) Listen to Animal by Jenny and Johnny live
6) Listen to Raw Sugar and Soft Rock Star by Metric live
7) Listen to Breathe Me by Sia Furler live

SIGH, I AM GOING TO DIE WITH REGRETS.

I can’t help falling in love with you.

(via stewyproject)